17/2 – A Very Ugly Day

Well, I try to pride myself to being transparent and honest on this trading blog.  I aim to share the good, the bad and the ugly.

Today was ugly.

Yesterday I took six trades, all of them losers.  I still need to review those trades more carefully, though I am pretty certain they were valid setups, and I managed them as I had set out to manage them at the start of the week (recall documentation->review->refinements).  The net loss on those six trades was 3.5R.  This morning I followed up with two further losing trades, losing a 1.25R.  That makes 8 consecutive losses netting 4.75R.  That roughly equates to the profits made during the preceding two weeks.
On the 2nd trade hitting my stop I jumped out of my chair and kicked my desk drawers at full whack two to three times, dislodging one of the drawers.  Then I threw the water bottle onto the ground, whilst swearing at full volume how much I hate trading.

One of my fellow trading colleagues was sitting at his desk at that time.  He had no warning and was rather surprised.  I put him in a awkward position.  I then
collected myself and quickly turned off all applications, shut the machine down and got my coat to leave. It was not even 8:30am yet.

I stomped off down the road trying to figure out what happened.  I know I sometimes lose my temper, but was surprised at the extent of what happened.

I spent the rest of the day running some errands and staring into space trying to make sense of what had happened.  Why am I so angry? Why am I so thrown by bad trading results?  Why am I taking this so seriously?  Why am I putting so much pressure on myself?  Surely this is not due purely to trading but to issues unfolding in my personal life?

One of the things I have written down for myself is that I need to be able to rely on myself.  I need to be able to count on myself, to act in my best interest, always.  If I cannot rely on myself, then I am pretty much doomed.

Today was a day in which I didn’t act in my best interest.  A great example of a Trader Meltdown.

For other examples of trader meltdowns have a look at this post from Nov’2014  or this one from Dec’2014  – it’s bloody amazing I am still trading!!

&*%#!&  [No translation needed]


This entry was posted in Psychology, Trend-Following Strategy. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to 17/2 – A Very Ugly Day

  1. clare says:

    commiserations for your losses George but this post has made me feel so normal, thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: 24/2 – Experiencing and working through a “Trader Meltdown” | Trick or Trade - the story of a currency trader...

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